


Of Chimneys, Baths, and Young Hobbits

by Olos



Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-07 01:45:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14660748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olos/pseuds/Olos
Summary: I should have expected this, but, I did not.I just wanted a cup of tea, but life and maybe Eru said no.





	Of Chimneys, Baths, and Young Hobbits

I walked into the kitchen, and saw a strange sight. Small, hobbit-ly feet sticking out of the chimney and pointing to the unlit hearth.  
/Thieves!/ Came the first thought, but when I strode forward and got a better look at the room, and then the feet, I noticed that the room was relatively orderly, nothing valuable missing, and that the feet were suspiciously small. Child sized, to be precise.

I got to and knelt by the hearth. The small grunts and whines were obvious then, the little feet moved up, then down, then up, wiggling, as if the owner of the appendages was hopelessly stuck. I grabbed the jutting limbs, and pulled.   
Down came the rascal with a puff of soot that made me sneeze. It’s none other than Frodo of course, the boy giggled once he had been freed from the brick prison he got himself into.

I half lifted, half dragged the hobbit until he is out of the hearth, and started a valiant effort to brush him off. I rued the fact that Bilbo procrastinated cleaning the chimney. /At least/, I mused, /it won’t take much effort now, considering that Frodo is now filthy./

In the midst of brushing Frodo’s front off, Bilbo came in, basket in hand, and said, “Gandalf, I’m off to the market. Do we need anyth… What happened here, dare I ask?” His eyes grew steadily wider as he took in the scene laid out before him.  
I sighed and said resignedly, “I caught this rascal halfway up the chimney. Indeed," I paused to run my hand through Frodo’s hair, and my hand came out blackened. “His hair ought to be turned into a chimney brush, so good it is at cleaning soot.”  
“No!” Squealed the rascal in question, holding a hand on his hair as if I would go through with my words.  
Bilbo stuttered a moment, and then said, “Gandalf, if you don’t mind, I’ll clean Frodo and you can go out to the market. I don’t mind either way.”  
I debated internally a moment, before saying, “No, it’s alright, I’ll bathe the boy. You go on out to the market. I looked about the room. I noticed a suspect lack of cheese, as just hours earlier there was a solid half a cheese wheel sitting on the window table. I saw the tell-tale crumbs that signified a messy eater had been at cheese, and the only messy eater that I knew had eaten here recently was Frodo.  
“I believe we need some cheese, if you can find it. This little burglar has gotten away with stealing the cheese and nearly getting out the chimney.” Despite my efforts to remain serious, I felt a smile creep up my face.  
“Alright, I’ll be back soon Gandalf. Thanks for doing this.” Bilbo turned to Frodo, and said, in a stern but slightly amused voice, “I expect you, young hobbit, to be very clean when I return, do you hear me?”  
Frodo took this humorously, laughing and nodding as only a child can.  
I nodded, and said, “Of course. I am here to help, after all.”

Bilbo turned and left, shutting the door behind him. I took Frodo’s wrist and said, “Come on, it’s time for you to help me draw up your bath.”  
The youngster helped me as we got water to the tub and warmed it up. Finally, after Frodo deemed the water warm enough, I put out the fire.  
“Well, out of your filthy clothes and into the bath with your dirty self!” I told the lad. He giggled and complied. As soon as he stepped into the water, it was stained a murky grey by the washed off soot. I sighed. /This might prove to be something/ I thought.  
I passed the boy a bar of soap, and a clean cloth. “You’ll be needing these.”  
“No!” He giggled, flinging the cloth onto my nose.  
I tossed onto his wet hair, and said, “ Yes, you will. It it time to clean, Frodo.”  
Not done with hijinks, the boy splashed me with water.  
I sighed, realizing I’ll have to do a larger load of laundry than expected. I put on my serious face and said, “I said, Frodo, it is cleaning time. Not splash Gandalf in the face with water time. Cleanse thine own self.”  
Frodo stopped giggling and to my great relief, started to wash himself.

After he was done and we were both in dry clothes, I sat Frodo down in the parlor.  
“Why did you think it was a good idea to climb the chimney?” I asked of the boy.  
“I dunno. I was curious?” Frodo ended his statement as if he were asking me.  
“I don’t know, were you?” I push him gently.  
“Yes, also, because I had eaten all the-“ he cuts himself off and covers his mouth with his hand as if silencing himself.  
“Because you ate all the cheese?” I felt again a smile start up my face, my eyes crinkling slightly.  
“Y-yes. Don’t be angry…” He trailed off, and I saw the timid, traumatized boy Bilbo had taken in just a month ago. I felt the urgent need to reassure him, so I set a hand on his shoulder and said gently, “I am not angry. Indeed, I am amazed at your ability to eat and craving for cheese.”  
He giggled softly, and it was not hard to tell that he was no longer nervous.

The front door pushed open, and Bilbo walked in, basket full, and I saw two cheese wheels poking out of the top.   
I smiled, and said, “We’re alright here. How was the market, Bilbo?”


End file.
